This is the follow up to my previous post, Moving On. To recap, I have reached the conclusion that it’s time to move to a new strategy in dealing with my challenges and achieving goals I have set for myself.
I have been saddened and continually disappointed that my new reality is isolation and loneliness. I mistakenly convinced myself that without the help, belief and motivation from a special someone, that I couldn’t lead a quality life. The absence of a partner by my side and my inability to find that valued individual, cast an ominous shadow over my heart and spirit. I felt rejected, ignored, forsaken, invalid. The weight of the anvil of melancholy upon my soul effected every aspect of my life. In summary, this void and constant heartbreak convinced me, despite my immense confidence in myself and my talents, That I had become….A Loser!
After a week of reflection, I am delighted to announce, I know now that the somber conclusion above, is simply not true. I am going to achieve my agenda and create the life I envision and deserve. I am taking a different route and it can be navigated by utilizing resources currently within my grasp. It also will require hard work, persistence and ingenuity on my part to make it happen. My whole life has always been based on finding the easiest way. It has become such a standard approach, I didn’t even realize that is what I always resort to. After all, the easy way, often times is the swiftest and most logical option. This time it did not work. As mentioned in the original story, it is clear now, that the plan was flawed, ill advised and doomed to fail. For the right person to miraculously join the cast as co-star, divine or mystical destiny and fate would have been required elements.
Ive rolled up my sleeves. I’m making lists, gathering contacts. I am brainstorming, setting up meetings, assigning tasks, utilizing existing, previously under utilized resources. I am suddenly energized by the delightful idea of finding another way. Whatever is cluttering and obstructing the path, is being cleared a piece at a time. Incredibly, the abandonment of the previous plan was the first step. Suddenly, after months of lethargy and stagnation, the creative process is flowing again.
In ten days, I am leaving for the west coast. Three days in LA, catching the Braves in Dodger Stadium, night life, food and fun. Then San Diego and three days in a rental condo on the Pacific. Braves/Padres, surf, sun and a day at the races in the Turf Club at Del Mar. Next stop, Vegas. Ten days total out west, living the high life. Other great trips are in the works. Concerts, shows, events, fine dining, just some of the components that will define everyday life. The theme is fun and fulfillment. Drama, misery and mundane routine can just be checked at the door.
Yes, this excursion of being a part if and building something outstanding, offered a unique and rind earful opportunity. An amazing daily life of creativity, laughter, achievement end celebration, while being the recipient of an inconceivable amount of love, respect, appreciation and treatment which could only be described as royal.
No question, after further review, I am certainly not the Loser from my inability to attract a special someone. As I began laying out the intricacies, ideas and strategies needed to get the train of Plan B rolling, I am on board for this remarkable adventure as the countdown for launch begins. The seat next to me is unoccupied. As I soar in the months ahead to where I want to go, it is crystal clear, despite my inability to see, my vision of what life should be is 20/20. I am certainly not the one who is losing out. That distinction belongs to that select few, the special ones who could have been in that empty chair.